Ok, seriously. Seriously. Bug Master, I'm going to need to you to get your troops to stop STOP doing this whole fly-around-and-die thing. Really. Because I've now cleaned my fridge twice in one month (more than we cleaned it in a year in room 207) and I'm really tired of scraping your brethren's guts into a trash can. Forget about the disinfecting process - I've already given up, deciding that if I've lived this long through you landing on my dinner and buzzing around my face, then my sealed food will be fine. The fridge does not need another dousing of lysol and bleach.

Speaking of, I'd really like to be able to buy fresh produce again. Soon. (please?) The only fruits and vegetables I can buy right now are of the prepackaged variety, in containers that will seal again once they're opened. Because you have this nasty habit of infesting anything of some interest to my stomach even when it's in a plastic bag (don't even get me started on leaving things to ripen on the countertop). So if it's disruption of my normal life you wanted, fine, YOU WIN. I concede defeat. NOW JUST GO AWAY. thanks.

ugh

So I joined a soccer team. Yep, me, Jen - the Jen whose buddy put up a post-it note next to his desk to tally the number of times I trip walking past his desk to get to mine. The Jen who face plants even when playing the sports she's GOOD at, like tennis. The very Jen who would rather duck from the ball, run AWAY from the ball, than chase after it (Jen's brain: who thought it was a good idea in the first place to run around kicking projectiles off the safe, safe ground into the air?? WHO??).

So this Jen played her first game today after prepping by buying cleats, shin guards, and soccer socks at Target and securing additional medical coverage on her health insurance policy. And Jen actually played for almost the whole game (minus about 5 minutes at the beginning of the second half; I love co-ed team rules when only 4 girls show up and there have to be at least 3 on the field) as the left-side defender. I was fierce. I was brutally unforgiving. I managed to get a "good job, Jen" from the goalie at one point, after stealing the ball away from the other team's offender. Yeaa-yerr! I had been all prepared to just pick flowers on the edges of the field, too!

The Hungry Hippos play their next game next Sunday, and I'm already pumped. I'm thinking about buying a real soccer ball to learn how to kick and control the ball during the week, but then I remembered that there's no green space in my area because I'm paying for it to be a dump site....stupid Katrina!