So many goodbyes today. So many partings that don't feel sad until the door is closed, the smile falls away and the heart drops.

I have this great yearning inside to look deeply into the eyes of whoever I'm talking to, hold their shoulders, and tell them what they mean to me. I want to scream, THANK YOU!, YOU MEAN THE WORLD TO ME!, YOU INSPIRE ME TO BE!, WORDS CAN'T DESCRIBE..., thank you. But I get the feeling that that might be a little awkward in the middle of Skiles, or a classroom, or after lunch. My heart is breaking, overflowing with unexpressable emotion that's instead coursing through my body and making me physically feel every thought.

In putting up the cheery face for the last hug, I suddenly realized today - am I robbing my hug-ee of their closure moment? Am I stealing the tender sadness away from a potentially moment worthy moment?

Pre-2:30pm, I was upbeat about the summer and the challenges to come.

Post-3:30pm, I was terrified about living alone, leaving home (here and home home), missing people.....I was smacked with finality.