Interesting week. It's always nice to have days when I'm too busy to really think, and then it's nice to have time alone, quiet, with the door shut to wonder what's going to happen in less than twelve months.

Our lives change so rapidly, chugging along slowly without any noticeable differences and then all of a sudden, you look back at the last six months of your life and you realize how much has grown -- your mind, your thought process, your outlook, your love. It still feels like just yesterday that I was going to FIU with Dr. Van Hamme. (*sigh* Belgians! *sigh*)

I feel like I've redeemed myself in my intro INTA class. I skipped class a couple of times and went to see the professor after the last test (I got a high B...sniff...it's 1110! c'mon Jen!) and was kind of called out on not being in class, so when I got my grade back today I was both relieved (96, buddy!) and slightly disappointed. I hate when I do well after putting forth little effort, because then I still don't feel like I deserve it and it makes me worry that I'll be adversely conditioning myself to not study very hard for tests if I do better on them when I'm not as dedicated to the class. Oh the paradox!

Sometimes I question why I put up with certain behavior, both in myself and in certain people around me. That's all.

Today: "I tried to think, if I was Jen, what would I put in the email subject? And I thought to myself, I think I'd put 'You are special. Smiley face.' "

Excellent, really. No, thank you.

I miss meaningful sleep. The kind of sleep you anticipate, look forward to all afternoon; the kind of sleep that calls to me from the bed in whispers and screams.

Goodnight world.